PLAYING MY SAVINGS (& RESPONDING TO THE PREVIOUS POST'S COMMENTS REGARDING THIS)
i have decided what to do, against nearly all the advice i've been given, i'm going to play all my savings, £89,500 to be precise. i'll probably start playing monday or tuesday night. the plan is to play anywhere from $10/$20 to $50/$100. if i do play $50/$100 or £25/£50 though i will only buy for half the max. . i'm going to be selective in games, and try and multi-table ring games. if i get bored then i'll swith to hu, rather than playing higher (i hope). i'll also try and spread my play around the sites so i should be able to put more hands in and be more selective.
i guess i have to justify this decision to you guys as well. it's mainly because i don't think i can play any lower and stick it, nor would i be happy. i haven't played a proper session for over 2 weeks because i can't get motivated to play low. many people think (including my parents) that i will be bust within a fortnight. possible, but i reckon by the end of june i will be back to £200k. as it is now i won't withdraw from my roll until i get to £250k, but if i feel the money is insecure i may get the parents to hold some of it for me.
the reason for using all the savings is so it will give me a decent bankroll at this level. i have no interest in putting money somewhere i won't be able to get at it for years, it would really piss me off if i went broke with the rest of the money. i accept if i go broke i will be very depressed but at the same time playing low stakes for a month will have a similar effect (perhaps not quite as bad but enough that it's worth the risk to do this). if i stay off the high tables i have every confidence that i will be able to maintain and increase my roll through the good game selection that i will use. taking shots at moving up the levels after every double or treble up doesn't really appeal to me (it is also hit and run), it would take alot of luck and i may lose overall at the level i start from (if i started say from $2/$5, $5/$10).
if i took out say 33% of my savings instead of it all i think i am much more than 3 times as likely to bust it (than if i used the full 100%) knowing i have another 67% behind me. buying stuff or spending it on holidays- right now i have no interest in that (cds and dvds the exceptions). i still enjoy online poker (a rarity for alot of medium stakes players i think) and i fully appreciate how great a tool for making a lot of money it can be. without doubt, without poker i would be earning in the region of £10k a year full time, probably at a job i am not keen on for a few years to come. the next holiday i go on will probably be poker related, eg. the cpc (caribbean poker classic), so really i may as well spend my savings on poker - which kinda makes the savings pointless, sadly. the only way i can truly take money out of the game is if i start a business outside of poker (which would be great but i am very uncreative) or to get a house.
despite me doing this, i'm really pleased so many of you posted your advice in the last post's comments and especially the tone, alot of support for me to do well- so, thankyou very much. i know i've gone against nearly all of you but i have considered each comment and whether i would be able to do that, and what is the best way forward. i've had alot of thinking time but i think this is the ideal solution to keep me happy in the short term, which is what matters to me right now. take the future as it comes.
i know as long as i can stay off the higher tables everything will be ok=)
i guess i have to justify this decision to you guys as well. it's mainly because i don't think i can play any lower and stick it, nor would i be happy. i haven't played a proper session for over 2 weeks because i can't get motivated to play low. many people think (including my parents) that i will be bust within a fortnight. possible, but i reckon by the end of june i will be back to £200k. as it is now i won't withdraw from my roll until i get to £250k, but if i feel the money is insecure i may get the parents to hold some of it for me.
the reason for using all the savings is so it will give me a decent bankroll at this level. i have no interest in putting money somewhere i won't be able to get at it for years, it would really piss me off if i went broke with the rest of the money. i accept if i go broke i will be very depressed but at the same time playing low stakes for a month will have a similar effect (perhaps not quite as bad but enough that it's worth the risk to do this). if i stay off the high tables i have every confidence that i will be able to maintain and increase my roll through the good game selection that i will use. taking shots at moving up the levels after every double or treble up doesn't really appeal to me (it is also hit and run), it would take alot of luck and i may lose overall at the level i start from (if i started say from $2/$5, $5/$10).
if i took out say 33% of my savings instead of it all i think i am much more than 3 times as likely to bust it (than if i used the full 100%) knowing i have another 67% behind me. buying stuff or spending it on holidays- right now i have no interest in that (cds and dvds the exceptions). i still enjoy online poker (a rarity for alot of medium stakes players i think) and i fully appreciate how great a tool for making a lot of money it can be. without doubt, without poker i would be earning in the region of £10k a year full time, probably at a job i am not keen on for a few years to come. the next holiday i go on will probably be poker related, eg. the cpc (caribbean poker classic), so really i may as well spend my savings on poker - which kinda makes the savings pointless, sadly. the only way i can truly take money out of the game is if i start a business outside of poker (which would be great but i am very uncreative) or to get a house.
despite me doing this, i'm really pleased so many of you posted your advice in the last post's comments and especially the tone, alot of support for me to do well- so, thankyou very much. i know i've gone against nearly all of you but i have considered each comment and whether i would be able to do that, and what is the best way forward. i've had alot of thinking time but i think this is the ideal solution to keep me happy in the short term, which is what matters to me right now. take the future as it comes.
i know as long as i can stay off the higher tables everything will be ok=)
posted by Ed Hollis at 7:25 PM
32 Comments:
We all know what is gonna happen...
Fair play to you sir. At your age theres no point worrying about lifes 'security measures'. Why have all that money burning a hole in your bank account when there's a poker game to be had.
I'm sure you're looking forward to being 21 and a visit to Las Vegas!
Enjoy and entertain the rest of us while you're at it!
They're be a book in this within a year :)
Ah, the way all of our degenerate gambling minds work. Love it!
Good luck mate, I really hope you get through a winner.
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Good lusk mate. I hope you will find your way to you wildest dreams.
It will get hard to land £250K, but I wote for you and follow you blog.
Man you are a heart breaker, i hope to god you don't go broke, but i can fully understand why you want to play your savings. At the moment i don't see any use for the money i have won from playing poker other than playing more poker.
From reading your posts, its obvious you have serious game and serious gamble($8000 behind K9o preflop!!!!!!!!).
I don't wanna sound like i think i know something, but (i will preach anyway), if you wanna continue to play poker at such a high level (&survive) surely it has to be essential that you add an extra dimension to your game. I'm talking about money management and discipline. Just set out something/anything that you can stick to which will dictate the rate at which you move up & down levels. No matter how may fish you spot!
I hope you do something like this so we can all keep reading, sleep easier, and cheer you on from the rail.
peas and good luck.
good luck.
Ed; be careful mate. This is a bad idea, you know it is. Forget the viewing public you owe them nothing and they will all drop you when you are busto again. Get a new account and play for yourself. Microstakes was never right for you, but neither is this. You can make a decent amount at 5/10 and tbh you have a lot of learning to do there still.
I will be on MSN later this evening if you want to chat. I wish you all the luck in the world mate, but there are better options.
wishing you all the best Ed.
Your BR is spot on for the $25/50 and £10/20 games.
My tuppence of advice is:
- keep HU play to a minimum, the swings are too big for your BR
- Don't move higher then the above levels...
- Set a stop loss (4/5 buy ins)
- Get poker tracker, so many positives to using this, and now you are sounding like you may put in a reasonable number of hands it really is a must.
all the best.
Fasten your seat belts, it's gonna be a rough ride....
I wouldn't bother playing $5/$10 as you'll get destroyed at those levels by the regulars.
Ed, even if you take out only 5K or 10K from the savings you plan on using for high-stakes gambling (which is a fairly negligable amount in the scheme of things)--do it.
For your own psychological well being, its important that you can say you've made a little money at this game and actually KEPT it.
So I say, take even 5K and give it to someone or put it somewhere that you CANNOT possibly touch it.
Psychologically, even if you lose the 80 or 90K, to be able to tell yourself you did win some money and hold onto it will be important.
You should be able to part with that much at least...it will barely affect your roll.
Good luck man.
You, "i've had alot of thinking time but i think this is the ideal solution to keep me happy in the short term, which is what matters to me right now. take the future as it comes."
There appears to be some sadness or emptyness in your life. It will not be fixed by blowing this £££. It is now cool to go to a Psychiatrist (Tony Soprano goes). You will be amazed at the insights and strategies which could be provided. It could be a hell of a lot cheaper than losing your bank.
Otherwise I suggest doing something outside of Poker, voluntary work maybe or do something with some ££ that changes the life of someone in difficult circumstances. You could try getting help to set up a small business, I don't like working for other people either.
PS : Don't feel as if you have to keep up with other flash players, spending lots of ££ on entertaining hangers-on. Also, make a rule like Azimut, don't lend to gamblers.
If you spun £200 up to £100k then you can do it again. Do what you did before but don't use big chunks of your savings.
Anyway, GL
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Here's a radical idea. Set your computer to show three decimal places. That way you can trick yourself into thinking you're sticking 10k in when in fact you're sticking in just 1k. Genuis!
http://help.blogger.com/bin/answer.py?answer=41963&query=time&topic=&type=f
Need to go here to change time zone
so young....
good luck
"i accept if i go broke i will be very depressed but at the same time playing low stakes for a month will have a similar effect (perhaps not quite as bad but enough that it's worth the risk to do this)"
You'll be depressed if you lose your money, and you'll be depressed if you play low stakes? So what you're saying is the only way you're not going to be a depressed person is if you are gambling for high stakes? No, you don't have a
gambling problem at all.
You need help, and I'm being 100% serious as someone who has a close family member who struggles with a gambling addiction. You have problems that go way way beyond not having good bankroll management skills.
Take 1/2 of 1% of your bankroll and spend it on a good therapist and be completely honest in your sessions. There is absolutely ZERO downside to this, the worst thing you can have happen is you pay a stranger to listen to your problems for a while a and tell you you're OK. My ardent belief is that it might dramatically change your life for the better.
Good luck Ed. If you stick to the games around the $5000 buy-in mark, you have the BR for it (just) and we'll see if you can actually beat the game. This is a perfectly good option.
It's a real shame you can't think of any use for the savings apart from cds and dvds though. Don't you want to see the world a bit?
And this comment - "If you spun £200 up to £100k then you can do it again." is the typical gamblers' mentality that leads to ruin. It's nonsense. If you allow your bankroll to drop to such pitiful levels again you'll probably never get back to high stakes again.
Edd, i have faith in you lol.
I beleive you can rebuild your £200k honestly i do. Lets stick to a stricter BRM plan though hehe. wish you good luck.
portdeco20
Respect for your decision,
and your guts.
Good luck :-)
This is as good as it gets for you. I hope you can handle being up to your eyeballs in debt for the rest of your life.
Wait one week, book into the best pyschatrist you can find.
Hi Ed,
No one wants you to succeed more than I do.
You will pursue your own path. My one piece of advice is to give your parents a present of say £20k. It won't make any real difference to your success in the long run but you could pay them back a bit for doing a good job bringing you up so well.
That is one thing you will never regret doing.
All the best
Been there for the whole rollercoaster ride. ffs man, take 50k out, use it as a deposit on a flat. Get a mortgage for the other 75-100k and rent it out.
Rent will cover the mortgage and secure your future. Still plenty left to hammer the tables.
We spoke loads of times about you hating lower levels but trust me you will hate them more when you dont have a choice.
To build up once was fantastic.
To do it twice was almost impossible.
Step back, bask in what you have achieved and look after the future.
Don't be another "nearly"
Feel im prob wasting effort typing it but will do so anyways. My last comment on blog. Good luck to you.
Paul
Is right lad.
Do it for Dixie.
Hey,
I believe you when you said that you read and considered all the comments. No one here wants you to be broke but you have made your decision and the people that you have drawn to this site have to respect that.
I wish you all the best and will follow your progress with interest.
Remember, you dont have to make millions overnight. Try to stay cool and enjoy making patient, considered and winnning decisions.
- may the force be with you -
Not a surprise. If you have a few pounds left to rub together do a search for a book called Compulsion, by Robin Moore. It's out of print but you'll find it secondhand.
there is much sense posted here Ed, as usual.
I won't bore you with b/r management - I offered that advice many times and you chose not to take it. That's fine - it's your money.
if you don't protect yourself from going bust again all your efforts will have been for nothing.
and that'll be the biggest waste of all.
dibble
If he was a compulsive gambler, how come he's been sitting on £90k in cash and hasn't played a game in 2 weeks? I don't think he can be classed as a compulsive. A depressive, maybe. What I can't understand is how someone can be so optimistic about a career in poker but so pessimistic about careers outside it. I believe anyone who is capable of playing poker for a living is also capable of earning more that £10k a year at a normal job. Why did you stop at GCSEs Ed? Looks like you gave up pretty early on in life. Considering you like to play short sessions at high stakes anyway, you could go and have 3 years at uni and have some fun and get some perspective. Don't worry about not being qualified, there's loads of academically shit unis around the country now that will accept practically anyone :)
BTW "Try to stay cool and enjoy making patient, considered and winnning decisions."
was that sarcastic?
My serious advice is this: find someone who can get you some LSD. It provided me with focus, will to win and game skillz at just the right time to build a bankroll, get the girl and kill the baddies.
You want to lose and you will lose, but it's possible that a night of fear, revelation and clarity will show you that a lot of your outward problems have been self-indulgent twattery. My guess is you're honest enough with yourself to be proven one of the good guys. Either way, why piss around not knowing?
mate, you need to spend some money on professional coaching, I am sure it will pay off in the long run. Please don't blow your life savings playing like this, it is just not worth it. Spend some time learning from the pro's and then you can play whatever limit you like.
You are on a serious self-destruct path. Ignore the pricks who are encouraging you, you have to get serious with yourself and I know it's harsh, but at the moment you are simply not good enough to play at the stakes you play at.
Whether you take this onboard or not is your choice, but have a good think about it. I don't want a fellow blogger, Brit, Pokerplayer and Everton fan self-combust the way you are heading.
help yourself mate.
ATB
Burnleymik
With respect
Are you retarded?
Why don't you just give the money to someone who can play?
Good luck anyway :)
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